Thursday, June 4, 2015

A speech on quilting

PLEASE READ (updated July 4, 2017)
I posted this in the spirit of sharing and because I found it amusing. I did not expect it to go viral (albeit in a minor sort of way) around the time it was originally posted. I try hard not to resent the fact that this post has had far more hits than any other single post on my blog even though it is about quilting - a sewing related activity that I do not participate in - and even though I didn't write the text.

(There is lots of good stuff on this blog! But it is not about quilting...)

I see that the link is making the rounds of the quilting sites and on Facebook again in the summer of 2017. I know this because I am getting e-mails asking me to moderate comments. I am tired of this page, tired of moderating comments for it, and *this close* to removing it.

Read if you must, but please, NO MORE COMMENTS!
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As you know, I'm a lawyer when I'm not sewing (or knitting). As such, I subscribe at work to e-mails that tell me of the latest decisions of the important courts here in Canada. There is one such e-mail prepared weekly by a local law firm. I always scroll to the end where, after the serious stuff, there is a section titled "Last Word". Today, it was about a speech given at a conference on quilting (Quilt Canada 2010) by Allan Fradsham, a criminal court judge in Calgary, Alberta, where the conference was held.

Here's the text. It's long but amusing, and so worth a read:


“When, some years ago, Gloria told me that she was going to build upon her years of sewing experience, and take up "quilting", I thought she was telling me that she was going to take up a new hobby or a new craft.  I was completely oblivious to the fact that what she was really announcing was that she was taking up membership in a tightly knit (if you'll pardon the expression) group of individuals whose loyalty to one another makes motorcycle gang members seem uncommitted, and whose passion for quilting activities makes members of cults look positively disinterested.  As is the case with many spouses, I was completely unaware that there existed this parallel universe called quilting. 

However, to be completely unaware of a world-wide sub-culture operating right under our noses and in our homes is a bit obtuse even for husbands.  But there it is, and here you are.  And, most oddly, here I am.  You might wonder how all this came to pass; I know I certainly do.

I cannot now identify what was the first clue I detected indicating that Gloria had entered the fabric world equivalent of Harry Potter's Hogwarts.  It might have been the appearance of the fabric.  Bundles of fabric, mounds of fabric, piles of fabric, towering stacks of fabric.  Fabric on bolts, and stacks of small squares of fabric tied up in pretty ribbons (I later learned these were "fat quarters" which to this day sounds to me like a term out of Robin Hood).  The stuff just kept coming into the house as thought it were endless waves crashing onto a beach. And then, just like the waves, the most amazing thing happened: it would simply disappear.  It was as though the walls of the house simply absorbed it.  Metres and metres (or as men of my generation would say, yards and yards) of fabric would come into the house.  It would arrive in Gloria's arms when she returned from a shopping excursion.  It would arrive in the post stuffed in postal packs so full that they were only kept together by packing tape (these overstuffed Priority Packs are the equivalent of me trying to fit into pants I wore in law school).  These packages would arrive having been shipped from unheard of towns and villages in far away provinces or states or overseas countries (I am convinced the internet's primary activity is not to be found in pornography; that is just a ruse, the internet's real function is to facilitate the trafficking and distribution of fabric).  Wherever we went, be it in Canada, the U.S., Europe, wherever there was a collection of more than three houses, Gloria would find a quilt shop from which she would pluck some prize from some bin with the enthusiasm and unerring eye of an archaeologist finding a new species of dinosaur.

And of course, the reason that there are quilt shops everywhere is because there are quilters everywhere, and I mean EVERYWHERE.  A few years ago, Gloria had been visiting her sister-in-law in Kelowna.  While there, she found and purchased a Featherweight sewing machine.  I understand that making such a find is a matter of such joy that it may eventually attract government taxation.  When it came time to fly back to Calgary, Gloria worried about what the people at airport security would have to say when she tried to take the machine onto the plane.  She need not have been concerned.  Now, airport security takes pride in preventing me from carrying onto a plane a small squirt of toothpaste left in a rolled up toothpaste tube if the tube in which it is lodged did at some point in the distant past, contain a prohibited amount of toothpaste.  My spot of toothpaste is a national security threat.  However, when it came time for Gloria to go through security with the Featherweight, which is made of metal and has needles in secret compartments, airport security came to a standstill.  Why?  Were they about to confiscate the machine, and detain the person who dared to try to board with it?  Of course not.  They gathered around it in awe and admiration, asking Gloria questions about where she had found it, and expressing admiration for her good fortune in finding it.  And why did Gloria get such warm treatment when I am shunned for trying to maintain some degree of oral hygiene?  Well, the answer is obvious; the assembled airport security staff were all quilters, complete with the secret handshake.

Maybe I should have twigged to what was happening when the washing of all this fabric led to having to replace our washing machine, which was clearly not designed for such industrial use.  Now, let me pause here.  I understand that there is an intense debate within your world about whether or not fabrics should be washed upon purchase.  I do not wish to be caught in any cross-fire between the two camps, for all I know, as an outsider, I may not be authorized to even know of the controversy.  I do suspect that if men were making the decision, quilting would involve  lot less fabric washing and a lot more beer drinking. 

I did eventually discover where all the fabric went.  It went into drawers, cupboards, shelves, and, eventually it completely filled up a closet, which took up one full wall in Gloria's newly built "sewing room".  What we now call Gloria's "sewing room", we used to call "the basement".

I have discovered that one of the art forms mastered by quilters is the ability to purchase container loads of fabric, conceal it in the house, and camouflage the purchase so that it slips right under the nose of the unsuspecting spouse.  As a loving and obedient spouse, I have on many occasions found myself in quilt stores where I serve two useful functions: I can reach bolts of fabric stored on top shelves; and I can carry numerous bolts of fabric to a cutting table.  However, I have also started to listen to what is said in quilting stores, and one day, in a little quilting shop in the heart of Alberta farming country, I heard something that made it clear to me that quilters are so clever and, dare I say, devious, that there is really no sport for them in fooling we naive husbands.  Gloria had decided to buy some fabric (which is similar to saying that Gloria had decided to breathe), and had gone to the till to pay for it.  Upon running through Gloria's charge card, the clerk quietly said, "Now, when you get your credit card statement, don't be alarmed when you see an entry for our local feed store.  We run our charges under that name so that if a husband looks at the credit card statements, he will think that the entry is just something he bought at the feed store for the farm".  That sort of financial shell game would make Goldman Sachs proud.  I knew at that moment that there had been a major and probably irrevocable shift in the world's power structure.  I concede it is basically over for the non-quilting husband. 

As you have been told, I sit as a criminal law judge, and as such I often find myself sitting on drug trials, or  issuing search warrants in relation to drug investigations.  I must say that the more I learned about the quilting world, the more I started to see similarities between that world and the drug world.  It has caused me some concern.

We all interpret events from our own perspectives using the lessons we have learned through life.  When I saw the extent to which Gloria's collection of fabric was growing, I began to worry.  In the law relating to drugs, the amount of a drug one has in one's possession is an important factor in determining the purpose for which the person has the drug.  For example, if a person is in possession of crack cocaine (to use a drug with an addictive power equivalent to fabric), one look at the amount of crack the person possessed.  If the amount exceeds the amount one would realistically possess for personal use, then one may reasonably draw the inference that the purpose of the possession is not personal use, but, rather, it is for the purpose of trafficking the drug.  So, you can imagine what I thought when I saw Gloria's collection of fabric grow to a point where she readily admitted that she could never use all that fabric in several lifetimes.  I reluctantly concluded that I was married to a very high-level fabric trafficker.  Mind you, in order to qualify as a trafficker, one does have to part with fabric, and I see very little evidence of that happening. 

In fact, the more I thought about the parallels between the quilting culture and the drug culture, the clearer the similarities became.  Consider the jargon.  I have learned that this vast collection of fabric, which is stored in our house, is a "stash".  Well, drug dealers speak of their "stash" of drugs.  Gloria speaks of doing "piece" work.  In the drug world there are often people who bring together the crack cocaine dealer and the buyer; think of a real estate agent, but not as well dressed, through perhaps somewhat less annoying.  Those people speak of breaking off a "piece" of crack as payment for bringing the parties together.  Sounds to me like a type of "piece work".  Those who transport drugs are often called "mules"; I have frequently heard Gloria refer to me as her mule when I am in a quilt store carrying stacks of fabric bolts (or did she says I was stubborn as a mule?).  Well, it was something about mules.  And I should think that this whole conference is a testimony to the addictive qualities of quilting.

In my role as a Sherpa, I have accompanied Gloria on various quilting expeditions, and I have been impressed by many things.  One is, as I have mentioned, that no matter where one goes, there will be a quilt store.  The proliferation of quilt shops makes Starbucks outlets seem scarce.  One day Gloria led me into a hardware store, which seemed odd to me, that is until I discovered that, as I walked towards the back of the store, the store had become a quilt shop.  The metamorphosis was extraordinary, and very crafty (if you will pardon the pun).  At that moment, I knew how Alice felt as she followed that rabbit down the rabbit hole.  Suddenly, one was in a different universe.  

Another thing I have learned is that the operators of quilt shops have great business acumen.  In one of Gloria's favourite shops, upon entry I am greeted by name and offered a cup of coffee.  If the grandson is with us, he is allowed to choose a book to take home.  It is all so friendly that I don't even notice that I cannot see over the growing pile of fabric bolts which fill my arms.  I wish that my doctor did such a good job of distracting me when it is time to do a prostate exam. 

I have learned that quilting is both international in scope and generous in spirit.  I have learned that quilters are quick to assist those in need, and that they have always been prepared to stand up for what is right.  For example, I think of Civil War quilts, which often conveyed messages about the Underground railway for slaves escaping to Canada.  I think of the One Million Pillowcase Challenge, and the Quilts of Valour project.  At one point, I thought of suggesting the creation of an organization akin to "Doctors Without Borders", but decided that an organization called "Quilts Without Borders" would indeed be illogical. 

And of course, there are the resultant quilts.  We have quilts throughout the house.  They adorn beds, chesterfields, the backs of chairs.  They are stacked on shelves, they are stored in drawers, they are shoved under beds, they are hung on walls.  There is even one on the ceiling of the sunroom.  They compete for any space not taken up with the fabric, which will eventually result in more quilts.  I live in a cornucopia, which disgorges quilts instead of produce.  I have decided that quilts are the zucchini of crafts.  But who can complain?  Quilt seriously, each one is a work of art, and an instant family treasure.  While family members and friends are delighted to receive them, I churlishly begrudge seeing them go out the door.

Though I tease Gloria about the all-consuming nature of her obsession, I am constantly amazed at the skill necessary to create those works of art.  I stand in awe as I watch her do the mathematics necessary to give effect to (or correct) a pattern.  When she quilts, she combines the skill of an engineer, a draughtsman, a seamstress, and an artist.  Her sewing machines require her to have, as she does, advanced computer and mechanical skills.  She knows her sewing machines as well as any Hell's Angel knows his Harley.  She uses measuring and cutting tools and grids, which would challenge the talents of the best land surveyors.

In short, I am very proud of what Gloria does, as each of you should be proud of your own skills and creations.  They are impressive and very evident at this Conference.  On behalf of those of us who wouldn't know a binding from a batting, I simply ask that when you finally and formally announce that have already taken over the world that you find some simple tasks for us to do to justify our existence.  You might call those tasks... the QUILT PRO QUO.

Gloria and I very much appreciate your warm hospitality this evening.

In closing, the hotel management has asked me to remind you that those found cutting up the table cloths for quilting fabric will have their rotary cutters confiscated and forfeited to the Crown.”

112 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for sharing. I shared it with my husband and then sent it to a Quilter's husband.

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  2. Fantastic. I sent it to Trena and Jordan.

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  3. I so enjoyed this read this morning and would love to share it. Do you have Gloria's husband's name? It sounds like it was delivered at a quilting conference, probably in Canada?

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    1. When I googled the conference I discovered that all the details had previously been published in a blog, so I amended my text above.

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    2. It could be worse...
      She could become a fabric company sales representative.
      And have to visit 2 to 4 quilt shops per day.

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  4. Sounds like both of them married well. :-)

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  5. This guy knows his stuff! This was wonderful. Thanks for posting!

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  6. I love that, do you mind if I share with my sewing guild????

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  7. So funny. I am a lawyer (in Calgary) and a quilter, sewer, and knitter. This piece must be from Judge Allan Fradsham. I had no idea his wife was a quilter. Judge Fradsham writes for the CBA newsletter and frequently mentions his wife Gloria. He is probably best known by lawyers in Alberta as the author of the Alberta Annotated Rules of Court.Coincidentally, Quilt Canada 2015 is being held in Lethbridge, Alberta right now (June 4 through 6).

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    1. Yes, it is Allan Fradsham. I gather he got a standing ovation when he delivered this talk.

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    2. What a wonderful piece of literature...great work Judge Fradsham and thanks deserved for supporting Gloria in her craft!!!

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  8. This is a man who gets it, truly gets it. They say that what makes us laugh is the truth – this is truly hilarious. And loving.
    Vancouver Barbara

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  9. Thanks I loved this... not only the funny bits (there is plenty of those) but also the appreciation that sewing is a skill that encompasses many, many differing skill sets.

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  10. I wish my quilts were like zucchinies . Lol

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  11. Hilarious -smacks of the truth !!

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  12. Geat sense of humor and what a loving, lovable husband he must be!

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  13. So true on many counts. Crap! How did he figure it out? And don't tell the rest of our husbands/boyfriends/partners.

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  14. You sweater is lovely and I'm sure just one of many lovely knitted garments to follow. However, the article is hysterically funny! Thank you for sharing that!

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  15. So funny! Lap slapping laughter! Brilliant!

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  16. I love this!! Could not stop giggling throughout it!!

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  17. Way too funny !
    LOL part was the credit card entry showing as a feed store purchase :-)

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  18. Oh my! What a well written, hilarious article! Thanks so much for sharing! Started my day with a happy face proud to be part ..albeit a small part...of a wonderful group!

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  19. Thanks so much for posting this, truly enjoyed reading it. I am not a quilter but a sewer and can SOOO relate! am forwarding to this to a friend of mine who just started sewing and recently went to Joann's for the first time and exclaimed " I love this store!!"

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  20. Oh my! This is fabulously funny and describes us to a t. I've enjoyed reafing it so much that my desire to buy more fabric has been reignited and I shall raise my credit card to you tomorrow when I add to my stash!!

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  21. I have worked as support staff for a Georgia regional drug task force for many years. Last year I started quilting. This made me roll with laughter! It is so much my life lol!

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  22. Hilarious and so true. Love "Quid pro quo".

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  23. very true observation. I might add this: When downsizing your home - as I had to do when moving into a care lodge, sell all but your favourite fabrics, I only had three suitcases of favourite fabrics left, so once I was settled in, I had to make 'scrap quilts'. Now I have to take all the little scraps to quit shops and find patterns and lots of new materials. You see, my old favorites, scraps et al don't match anything anymore, so they are only good for making some potholders for friends.

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  24. Such a supportive and helpful husband!

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  25. Loved this article! :-) Quilting is like traveling to another world, a world of design, color, imagination and love. Happy Quilting ladies!

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  26. Fabulous! Loved reading it.

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  27. Enjoyed the article. I can see myself, my friends north & south of the border....

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  28. One of the best and funniest writings on quilts I have ever seen, thank you!

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  29. I think the judge is a lot quilt smarter than he gives himself credit.. Sincerely, Paula K.

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  30. Kay, this is a delicious text, I seriously savoured it. This was obviously written by a man with verve and spirit. Though I do not quilt, as many of us I could relate. But 3000 view in one day. You post made it around the quilting planet for sure. Proof the all leads to all as we say in French (Tout est dans tout), law and sewing are related.

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  31. What a great read that is! Perfectly said and all true! The twist of humor made it fun to read, thank you for sharing!

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  32. As the husband of a quilter and compatriot with the author of the above treatise on the quilters husband, I am reminded of several science fiction premises involving "hive minds" and "collective consciousness". The TV series Star Trek, The Next Generation, and the introduction of the species: The BORG comes to mind. All I can say is "RESISTANCE Is FUTILE". But then again I am A Harley Davidson guy! :)

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  33. What a delightful read! Now can you imagine the fun he might have if someone explains to him about seam rippers?

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  34. As a husband of a quilter, it should be law, that anywhere in the world a Quilt Shop is located, next to it should be a 2nd hand store, tool supply outlet, fishing hole etc. And remember to roll down the windows on a hot day for us and leave water
    .

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    1. You win for the best comment! LOL

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    2. Take your spouse to Hamilton Missouri to Missouri Star Quilt Co. At least 6 shops in that group and they take very good care of spouses.............lol

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    3. In Nova Scotia there is a quilt shop in the country that has a hardware store next door! How clever!

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  35. While I do not have a husband as of this writing, and do not anticipate such any time soon, I can relate. My best male friend has seen me in the throes of quilting mania. Fortunately, he has his own manias. :)

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  36. I was at the Gala dinner at Quilt Canada in Calgary when he spoke. Everyone roared and the husbands were agreeing yes, yes, and yes.

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  37. Thank you for sharing this humorous take on quilting by Allan Fradsham. I have provided a link to your post on my blog, quiltbindings.blogspot.com. I saw from other comments that you did not mind sharing.

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  38. What an amazing post, I enjoyed every single word of it and am still smiling from ear to ear. Just wonderful.

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  39. This should be sent to Quilter's Newsletter, so more of us can enjoy it :)

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  40. What an entertaining read! Thank you for sharing such a great laugh!!!

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  41. Absolutely brilliant post! I resemble it all as does my patient hubby sounding the same. I would like to add that we do participate in the "husband awareness program" paying with a little to cash, credit, personal check!! That throws them off track!! True..just like a drug it is..but so much enjoyment.

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  42. The zucchini of craft. Love it, love it.

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  43. This was sent by a friend in Hamilton, ONT who does fine needlework. However, the syndrome is in all sewing related areas as well as art-stamping which I do in addition to wearable art and making my own clothes. Recently, I made a suit from gabradine purchsed at G-St. Fabric when they were ON G-St. in Washington, DC in the early 1970's--I have a stash. I laughed until I cried.

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  44. So priceless and true! Thanks go to Allan Fradsham for writing this. Am printing this out so I can share it with my DH who doesn't have a clue how much fabric I have!

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  45. I have so can relate to this speech. I would have loved for my husband and I to have been there when it was delivered. I love the credit card/feed store part of the story best. Quilt on! Thanks for sharing.

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  46. Thank you so much for posting this!!! I laughed and have tears in my eyes. I admit that I am just like Gloria and my Husband of 25 years gets it.

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  47. What a glorious speech. My husband is studying law and has often expressed the view that quilting is a cult.

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  48. What a fabulous speech. I'm sure my husband would echo every word. Not only amusing but true in every word. I'll be sharing it with my quilting friends here in the UK. Thank you for taking the time to share here.

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  49. This speech is so COOL! As a quilter, and pauper, I have a stash, but nothing compared to Gloria's. I thoroughly enjoyed the man's take on quilting, and expect other husband's are pretty much of the same mind...except, of course, those who quilt, themselves. Men quilters do awesome work, I find. Thanks for sharing. I got this site from an antique/vintage Singer Yahoo Group. It's funny to me, how crafters seem to cross "train". I'm also a machine knitter.

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  50. This was shared on one of my quilting groups. It's wonderful! And now I will pass it along.

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  51. Wonderful description of us quilters!! I certainly could relate to it!!

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  52. WOW what a brilliant narrative, i identified with everything you said.. that's right i'm a quilting junkie lol!! I laughed till i cried.. simply wonderful!!

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  53. I will enjoy reading best at our guild meeting Monday night. We have a new shop nearby. Very smart shopkeeper keeps a husband chair with magazines. She follows your new fabric into the tiniest peace that she could manage to squeeze into the tiniest bag. Next door is a new net shop. To Joyce next to each other while lucky me. I leave my husband in the car with his tablet playing solitaire, with the windows rolled down of course we do live in Georgia

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  54. Love it so so true. Lynda

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  55. A friend directed me to this article. Hilarious!
    Thank you for sharing.

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  56. I love this. Thanks for making me smile. I will be sure to share this so others can take in the joy of this. I am very sure my husband and my father can relate. Machell Burlington Iowa

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  57. So Hilarious and Mostly True! Thanks for the laughs Kay!

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  58. Really enjoyed this and have retread it several times already today. It's now appended to the e- newsletter of our quilt group with instructions to settle down with a cuppa before opening. I may be in trouble because I forgot that you can't laugh out loud with a mouthful of tea or coffee without making a mess. Thanks once again from Lincolnshire, England.

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  59. I so pleased with your understanding of the situation, my husband thinks i'm the only fabric hoarder and doesn't understand the pleasure we get, not only from buying, but using or just folding and organizing (stroking) the different patterns and colours. Our mathematical skills are great- working out money, accurate measuring, matching and sorting to name but a few. My husband has just kitted out a room for me, so he now knows exactly how much fabric I have, plus all the accessories. Thank you all the understanding sherpas or co-traffickers (husbands). Some people say "rock on!" I say "Quilt on" and role on retirement!

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  60. I found this very hilarious, had a good laugh at it and think he must be a wonderful husband. thank you for sharing this with us all. will pass on the link to all my quilting friends. Ace in Scotland

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  61. Wow! Your explanation is right on. Thing is I didn't realize that is my life until I read it. I'm glad to be a member of the "Quilters Gang".
    Thanks so much for sharing and enlightening.
    Vicky

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  62. We loved this! Shared with our customers in the UK and around the world who we knew would love it too. Liz, The Cotton Patch, England.

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  63. What an attentive man. He really, really listens.....not only with his ears, but with his heart. Love his take on our addiction.

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  64. I love this. Also loved the comment that what makes us laugh is usually the truth. I had such a quilting obsession that I opened my own shop 4 1/2 years ago, with my husband, Papa's support. He has had to eat alot of pizza, but never complains. We have a happy stream of men and women through our doors every day; it's a beautiful obsession! Nana

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  65. A friend's husband once commented that having his wife quilt was better than having her go for therapy...I think he may be rethinking this after 15 years of stash accumulation! Thanks for bringing a smile to many a quilter after reading this perspective.

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  66. Oh I LOVE it!!! I must read this to my husband. :)

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  67. Every husband/partner of every quilter could have written this but not with the same eloquence. Thanks for making me smile on a wet and miserable day.

    From a quilter in Scotland (with a stash that rivals many quilting shops!)

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  68. a total joy to read, thank you

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  69. How I relate to all of this! and I also have enjoyed G-Street, bringing home more "stash".....Moving to a small apartment meant to creating a new stash area in my every under bed, sofa, chair areas...plus in my storage area ..I loved this article and laughed at how true is was! So nice to have so many who are in cahoots with me!

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  70. Oh no, please research Underground Railroad and quilts....they did not use quilts in this manner! A tall tale!

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  71. Even after 10 years of quilting I am still only at Kindergarten level with stash :)

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  72. I was sent the link to this today. It is very entertaining - and very true! If my husband would take the time to read it, he would agree with it all. I once spoke to a trader who said that a lot of his customers get cash back when they use their debit card for grocery shopping, to keep their spending on fabric secret!
    I shall have to forward the link to my quilty friends!!

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  73. Wonderful!! I thoroughly enjoyed it, and laughed out loud any number of times.

    Although I do a great deal more garment sewing than quilting, I do have a considerable stash (I've been sewing for almost 60 years!). Just today my husband said he didn't understand why I had to have so much fabric. Why not just decide what you want to make, go and get the fabric, and make it?! (He has no idea how hard it is to find the right garment fabrics when you want them....)

    Of course, *I* don't understand why he still has old thermostats, etc., rescued from the years he did customer service for the gas company (someone would get a thermostat replaced, and instead of pitching the old one, which was still good, he'd keep it). But that's different, right?! LOL

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  74. Received the link to this speech in a newsletter from quilt teacher and author Ami Simms. What a delightful read! It certainly perked up my afternoon.

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  75. He is the perfect quilted husband.

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  76. I loved it, and the Quilt pro quo, this husband is great at story telling so yes he should be in a quilt guild and he already knows the lingo from his day job. That was a delight and funny but pretty accurate story..

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  77. I was at the conference where this speech was delivered and quilters were almost rolling on the floor laughing so hard. It was a great evening and he was a great speaker.

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  78. What a wonderful speech! Made me grin from ear to ear and immediately forwarded the link to a few friends. It is priceless!

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  79. The absolutely funniest - on target - homage to the great Quilting Arts Gods I've ever read!

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  80. Very enjoyable! Thank you for sharing. Sounds like my house.

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  81. Oh I just loved that story. At the moment we have a carpenter in building a double wardrobe where I found a void in the wall in my sewing room, so now I will have two double cupboards.....Also I find myself looking at furniture in a different especially if it has nookes and crannies to put bits and pieces and fabric in of course......................my dear husband of 48 years as of yesterday cringes if I say,
    "I have had a good idea"...............Noelene from Australia.

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  82. Love this!! I could see my friend, Judge John Mitchell of PEI, standing up and giving this story! The only trouble is his wife does not quilt...her sister does!!
    I'm glad to know as a quilter....I'm not the only sly one!!!

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  83. What a hoot! I wish that my late husband had had such a sense of humor. And I do envy Gloria the Featherweight!

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  84. Absolutely brilliant - it should go on a CD or DVD or something - and so accurate - he really knows his wife - which I love - and he really knows exactly what she is doing. Wonderful.
    Pauline
    perry94022 at hotmail dot com

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  85. Great reportage on an addiction that so many of us can so easily understand; it's great living with an understanding spouse.

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  86. This guy knows what he is talking about.
    Being also a bolt mule and having visited (and sat outside) numerous quilt stores world wide it is good to know there are others of us around.
    Maybe we can set up a Quilters' Husbands Anonymous support group.
    "Hi, my name is X and I live in a house inundated with threads"

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  87. I loved it. I lost track of the times I laughed out loud. My husband also went to shops and shows with me. He often stated many of the same things as this gentleman. Thank you so much for sharing this with us.

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  88. Hilarious, can't stop laughing hahahaha! My husband would not know the cost of the materials or the templates I buy and he believes in privacy so never peeks at my credit card statements even though I leave them laying around! And if he does do I care? He spends happily on his toy, the boat, the holiday home, the tools in the shed he never uses and now all the toys he buys so he can watch TV anywhere in the house, so I have a case to present even though I am an accountant , not a lawyer and I made him understood we trust each other not to get in trouble with money and it worked for 44 years and we are still happily married! Never ever half the price etc as you get into trouble, always tell the truth and you will win, hehehe!

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  89. Wonderful!!!
    A man that pays attention to his wife and her passion!!!

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  90. Hilarious and so on point! I have to make my husband read this to understand he's also a member of a cult....ahem, club. There should be a name for that husband's group. Anyone? Great read and I plan to share with my guild friends. Thanks for the big smile and laugh this morning.

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  91. Absolutely fabulous! A husband who doesn't stand in the way of fabric art and appreciates it all! God bless him, now honey could you reach that bolt up there for me? Not that red one, the one that looks watermelons! Yep that's the one! LOL God bless all our husbands that ( try ) to understand our fabric addiction!

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  92. Thanks for sharing ! My quilting journey began whilst we lived and journeyed on a small yacht. The bug bit! At each harbour we sailed into, top of the shopping list was finding a quilt shop. Over the years food lockers became places to stash fabric! After 6 years living this lifestyle we had quilts adoring banks, two sewing machines NOT including a Featherweight! My obsession has only grown now that we have 'swallowed the anchor' and are land based in Australia, with a large sewing space!

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  93. my Hubby broke out in a sweat at a quilt shop and I followed him outside thinking maybe he was having a heart attack. He said he was fine just hot. It then dawned on me : he is an Accountant and suddenly realized how much money I could be spending on fabric purchases ! I posted this also on FB // Bunnie France

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  94. I sew loved it! I just had laugh as I read this and have shared a link to it on my blog -

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  95. This is so brilliant. I read it to my husband (who is very supportive of my 'addiction' and he was in tears - can so relate he said. Standing ovation well deserved.

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